High Bias
October 26, 2003
[see the current issue]
Elliott Smith, 1969-2003Wow. I think it's safe to say that no one saw this one coming. When singer/songwriter Elliott Smith wasn't touring or promoting an album, he kept to himself. Rumors, such as the one about him climbing back on the horse, might spread, but official statements rarely appeared unless he had music to support. But we never know how much stock to put in rumors; unless certain ones persist, they're easily ignored. And since Smith was hardly a big enough star to be constant fodder for wagging tongues, there weren't enough hints in the air to predict this kind of tragedy. Thanks to his death, we now have plenty of reports detailing his running battles with drug and alcohol addiction, his uneven performances of the past year, the recurring pain in one of his hands and, tellingly, his prescriptions for anti-depressants. It seems the sadness in his music wasn't feigned or exaggerated, and he was quite forthcoming in song about his love/hate relationship with heroin. As we know from Kurt Cobain's example, smack, depression and chronic pain can be a lethal combination. But we'll ultimately never know why such a smart, talented and, by most accounts, loving guy like Elliott Smith would kill himself. Suicide has a funny reputation. The general view is that most folks who call suicide hotlines or botch their attempts to kill themselves are considered pathetic whiners who just want attention. (Though if a suicide attempt, determined or not, is the extreme to which one has to go to be noticed by the rest of humanity, there's something wrong with both participant and spectators, but that's a different issue.) But what about the ones that succeed? What kind of despair permeates someone to the degree that he or she sees no way out of the deep, dark hole except death? How can those of us left alive understand what goes through the mind of someone so determined to end his life that he makes sure he's alone and that no one knows what he's doing, so there will be no mistake and no reprieve? (more) |
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